The Headached Grace Of LU

LU. Thats what we called it when I went to LU( Lucknow University) It used to be the space of action in the laid back city of Lucknow. In the TOI supplement you would read things like ' Another bout of firing in the Campus. Two students injured' 'Incidents of eve teasing on the rise' 'A girl stripped naked in the examination Hall'..after a point you would nonchalantly say..yeah so whats new? But If you were me you could never imagine in your worst dreams of doing your BCOM from there!

Delhi is the dreamwonderland for middleclass girls of Lucknow. SRCC and St Stephens college came to me in my dreams! If I scored good marks I could go to the other side of the polished eclectic divide. Away from the Bindi Belt sensibility! And I did all sorts of things before fate threw me into George Ellen college aka Lucknow University!

There I was a victim of fate in this lumpen land. And If I had the arrogence of thinking it would be easy getting in I was so wrong! I had missed my couselling day by four days! And there were some 15 thousand people vying for that one seat! I could go to Hell or Stepehens they didnt give a damn
Two people cared. One was my mom who pushed me in that purgatory of the last counselling for admissions saying ' They cant refuse you! You were in their merit list' The other was this Pankaj Misra lookalike( Sorry Pankaj my love!)higly armed student leader present to help the needy ones like me.He wanted my vote in case I got in! I would have given him the vote to become the Prime Minister that fateful day! (Imagine being pushed to enter hell and not being allowed in because of other miserable ones) I pinned my hopes to this man. And he got me in at 7pm sharp 3 firing in the sky later! If he stands for elections to the PM's post I will gladly vote for him even today.He had the might of what it takes to move things.

SO then it started slow motion. I got full sleeved kurta salwars stiched.I was the bindi belt youth now! There would be no 'hanging out with friends' in this college! You never attended classes( didnt dare to I should say) and showed up only during exams when it was safer. You passed reading those Atom bomb Noorul Hassan guidebooks. And you never mentioned your political affiliations. It was the kind of place where you automatically spoke for the party that was in power. CIRCA 2003 It was the Shining India BJP.
When I was there I kept cribbing that my life was ruined. I would never have any stories of college days to recall!I would never ever match up in debates with the LSR, HINDU ilk.But life is strange. People and places change their tastes on your tongue.Of late I have started missing that discourse of the small town. The kind of things that matter to those I went to college with. How they never talked about big cars and never measured people with small sticks of the labels they wore or the accents they had picked up.How the teachers were like kindred Patriarchs who would call you 'Beti' and pester you about the egjamination tikit. How it would take 15 minutes of brisk walking to reach from one classroom to another. How the Jacarandas and Gulmohure went mad in the maddening summer. Those wooden staircases creaked and the walls were crumbling forever.

It did something to me which I am greatful for in retrospect.It brought me in level with the 80 percent India and made me one of them forever.I realise this when the facade of luxury that I have built with much labour breaks down. When the car breaks down at a scary( to others) suburb. When I can take my bag and travel to any small town India and can take public transport with sweaty men rubbing into me and yelling toddlers dropping saliva. When I deal with atrociously bull headed babus and crazily vulnerable and criminally inclined young men. It helps If you have been to Lucknow University! It gives a strange tow of grace. Its like getting a training of becoming the connosieur of bullock cart ride. Years later you realise that it was slow but it moved!

That you never got any cool freinds while you were there but you earned an understanding about the real sweat and blood India. That you didnt have Acs in the classroom but you got a degree that is recognised in the whole wide world( Unlike some of those fancy private institutes) You never heard of Campus placements but you got a campus that had history that has volumes written on it by fancy firangs. That you paid some 2000/per annum and there could be people from any remote village sitting next to you helping you with the buisness administration paper. That you didnt have filmstars attending your college fest but your lumpen looking colleague would tease you with verses from 'Madhushala'. That you never could find college romances but you found the kind of friends who never moved over!

A heady heaached grace! But grace neverthless!